How Do I Know If He’s The Right One for Me?
Simply put- you don’t. My girlfriend asked me this recently. She’s in her mid-30s…no husband, no kids, and desperately looking to change that. She has really high standards and believes this is the reason why she hasn’t been able to keep a long-term boyfriend.
Of course, I told her that having high standards is a good thing, but not too high because she has to be realistic. Every person will have flaws. It’s about determining whose flaws you can live with.
For example, I can deal with a guy who is opinionated and always thinks that he’s right, but I can’t deal with a guy who is inconsiderate and doesn’t put me first. Another example, I can handle it when a man has had lots of past girlfriends, but I can’t handle a man who has had lots of children with those past girlfriends.
Furthermore, I told her that she shouldn’t have to feel as though she’s “settling.” Therefore, I suggested that she make a list of the things that are definitely deal breakers. Then, make a list of things that she is more flexible with and willing to compromise. Piece of Cake.
How Do I Know When Marriage Is The Right Step?
Well, Mr. Perfect does not exist, so don’t look for him; but after you have found someone that you believe is the “right one,” be sure to make the decision regarding marriage with your heart AND
mind. Using only one or the other can be disastrous. Don’t be that person who is so head over heels in love that they can’t see the train wreck right in front of them. Also, on the other hand, don’t be that over meticulous person that blueprints every detail of their future because you may wind up with someone who fits perfectly into your plan, but if the love is nonexistent then the train wreck will head your direction soon.
Like I told my friend: you’ll know who
and you’ll know when
. Just be smart and pragmatic while following your heart.
Image courtesy of digitalart / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
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